Things to Act

Well, ready or not, my new semester is now in full gear, with the second week of classes come and gone.  It is one of the most bizarre and multicultural semesters of my life.  I have seminars on the American Civil War, Modern Chinese History, and Afro-Latin American History, none of which seem to overlap in the least degree.  And since they are all readings seminars, it appears that my semester will be comprised of somewhere around 900 to 1000 pages of reading per week, with 6-9 pages of writing to accompany 9 hours worth of class time in which to be grilled over the content, meaning, and inherent flaws within those 900 pages.  At moments like this, it's hard not to take a step back and ask myself "What were you thinking?"  Following such moments of introspection, I can't help but remember the line spoken by the snake in an oft told story, "You knew what I was when you picked me up."

But I'm learning that these moments of introspection can take two very different paths.  I can choose (as I often do) to lock up and give way to complete discouragement about the week at hand (and if it is a really bad day, about the whole semester), or I can choose to turn the page and keep reading.

All of this brings me to Lehi, and one of my favorite scriptures, which is found in Second Nephi.  Speaking to his young son Jacob about the Creation, the Fall, and the Atonement (what Elder Bruce R. McConkie dubbed "The Three Pillars of Eternity"), Lehi said, "And now, my sons, I speak unto you these things for your profit and learning, for there is a God, and he hath created all things, both the heavens and the earth, and all things that in them are, both things to act and things to be acted upon" (2 Nephi 2:14).  He then went on to explain that "the Lord God gave unto man that he should act for himself" (2 Nephi 2:16), a condition made possible by the Savior's atonement (see 2 Nephi 2:26).

I think that all of us will agree that life holds more than its fair share of unfair moments, difficult challenges that are part of our mortal experience and which are beyond our control.  Classes require too much reading; work requires too many long hours and is handicapped by too many politics; we are asked to experience the challenges posed by sickness, fatigue, and occasionally even death; and through it all we are asked to put a smile on our face when we don't feel like smiling, to love, and serve, and uplift others who are experiencing challenges even more painful than we are experiencing.

In the process, I think that all of us reach points where we just want to throw our hands up into the air and surrender to the challenges that are perplexing us.  In such moments, I believe that we can take comfort in two eternal facts.  First, as sons and daughters of God, we have been endowed with the power to act.  Because of that relationship and that divine gift within us, we maintain the ultimate sovereignty over our attitudes and feelings, even though everything else in our lives seems to be beyond our control.  Second, I believe that in the end we will discover that it was these moments that ultimately defined our lives because they compelled us to seek for God's help. 

In July 1865, shortly after the assassination of Abraham Lincoln, Noah Brooks recalled an experience in which Lincoln told him the following: "I have been driven many times upon my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go.  My own wisdom and that of all about me seemed insufficient for that day." (Don E. Fehrenbacher and Virginia Fehrenbacher, Recollected Words of Abraham Lincoln, 50).  While this statement may be apocryphal, the sentiment expressed by it is everlastingly true.  The Lord gives us challenging experiences and difficult circumstances to deal with, at least in part, because they serve to draw us to Him and help us to use this divine gift of agency to seek out His help, thus cementing our relationship to Him.

Brett